Stress Comes in All Forms and Ages | Sandling All Day

Monday, March 10, 2014

Stress Comes in All Forms and Ages

I was at the grocery store today with the husband, shopping just before we picked LS up from school, when we got a call from the school.  We usually get pretty freaked out when we get a call, because it's usually he's feeling sick or hurt...  This time it was the principal.  This is really unusual, because she rarely make phone calls.  She said that our son wasn't sick or hurt, and he wasn't in trouble, but she needed to speak to us after school.  
Uh oh......

So we paid for our groceries and went to the school, prepared for the worst.  On the drive, my husband was going through his "if someone hit my son again" and "I'm tired of my son getting picked on at school...something has to give."  I stopped him, and explained that it may not be ANYTHING like that, that we shouldn't jump to conclusions, just keep an open mind.  Now let me explain, that the other day a child slipped in the mud and my son laughed, and the kid punched my son in the stomach.  HARD.
So my husband has a reason to be concerned...  Especially since this is his first (bio) son, and he's really over protective of him.
So we get to the school, park and go into the office.  It's pretty busy, as usual, but the principal (we'll call her O for typing's sake) greeted us and we walked into her office.  Our son was sitting in a chair with his back to us.  I immediately scanned him, looking for evidence of tears, blood, bruises or any tell-tale sign of what's going on.

Ok... O then tells us that our son said something, that was over heard (and confirmed) by several other children that was distressing to them, and they had to deal with it.  He said "I want to kill myself"  Our 8yr old son...  My first thought was that he was trying to get attention.  He does this.  
She then goes on to explain how he then said that sometimes he blurts things he's thinking out, and stuff like that. 
O further explains that he says he's got a stress level of a 9 or 9.5 fairly often.  We know this.

My husband goes to explain that our son has pretty much gotten away with murder, and he is spoiled rotten. He has never really had any real consequences, and this is a by-product of that.  That over the last month or so, my husband has really cracked down on the naughty behaviors, and because of that, our son has been showing that.  O said, "LS gave us a date of Feb 1st that he's started really feeling stressed"  Yup.  That's about the time that he started getting REAL consequences for the behaviors.  It used to be that he'd "loose" a toy he was supposed to get, but that eventually, husband would give in and buy it anyway.  Within a week, DH would buy him a half-dozen toys.  I think DH feels a bit guilty because he can't do everything for him that he WANTS to, because physically we're not in any condition to do things like a "normal" father.

I digress... so this was my day... Now I'M tired and stressed....  and I can't even go to my "go-to" which is chocolate or ice cream, because I've gained a few pounds over the last month myself from stress eating...  


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